Gods Hand of Protection

The last words my husband spoke to me on

September 24, 2013 were these. . . . . 

"I am a liar and I can never be trusted!"

This was his response when I tearfully

asked him why he had lied about an 

insurance payment.  He has been caught in

yet another lie.  He never came home that

night . . . or ever again.  This was the 3rd 

time in the last 3 years that he had been

caught in a financial lie.  Each time before,

he would pack up and leave me for a few

days until he assumed everything would blow

over and then he would return home to let

me know his intent to make everything right.

He would be diligent in bill paying, clean up

his bookkeeping, and make it all up to me . . .

even if it took the rest of his life.  He would return

with a card in hand,with a handwritten note inside,

telling me how much he loved me and that he 

would clean up everything.  He would say that he

was just a sloppy bookkeeper.  I would then try

to assist him in getting organized by filing, straightening

and helping him any way I could.  

This last time was different.  I spent the next day

traveling from bank to bank, utility companies,

insurance companies, and creditors  to find out 

taxes had not been paid, bills had not been 

paid, utilities were about to be shut off, accountants

had not been paid for years, and money had been

drained from all our checking and savings accounts.

Not only was the money gone, my car as well as

my daughter's car had liens against them totally

more than they were worth.  My daughter's

home had liens against it that she had no 

knowledge of.  Basically, our financial state 

was in ruin.  The bank register book was a

lie, none of the information that I so diligently

kept was accurate.  Withdrawals were never logged

in.  Basically, we were broke.  Documents with my

signature had been forged and notarized without my

knowledge.  Money had been taken from my mother's

account without my knowledge, with my signature

forged.  

The next month was spent cleaning up the financial

mess I had been dealt.  Every day brought new bills.

I wondered if I would ever clean up the mess.  This

was an area I had trusted my husband to handle

for the entire marriage. I now knew I had made

the biggest mistake of my life.  

Not only was I facing a financial crisis, but I 

realized the man I had trusted for so many years,

could not be trusted.  I now learned that I was to

face this alone . . . and that I could not trust

him again.  I was not on my own.  

But, in the days ahead, my faith in God became

stronger and stronger until he literally picked me

up and carried my for what seemed like months.

I vaguely remember those months.  Everything is

a blur looking back now, but I remember every

day filled with tears, disappointment and questions.

How could someone do this to their family?

Not only was I facing this trial, but my two 

expecting daughters were devastated as well.  We

spent most days holding each other and crying.  We

bonded during this time and found a love that can

never be broken.  You see, when you face a crisis 

with someone . . . there is a connection . . . we

all became one in our pain.  We shared tears and

fears and knew we would get through it  . . . only

with God and each other.  God became so real 

to our family during this time . . . His love and 

protection poured out on us like I can't explain.

We trusted Him in all things, knowing He would

not leave or forsake us.  We did remind each other

of this over and over again . . . we all knew the

truth and we were clinging to this promise.  

We have all grown in Christ through this trial.  We

are changed and I can honestly say we are better

because of what has happened to us.  We all know

that family is what matters most.  Money means

nothing to us.  Belongings have been replaced 

with special times together.  Possessions are

meaningless.  

I can honestly say these things because I have

now pretty much sold everything I own.  My 

house and all the belongings.  I want a fresh 

start . . . not with things . . . but with people.  

I want relationships to be first in my life.  I

want to show love to those in my life that 

mean the most to me.  I want God's love to be

evident in my life.  I have realized that true

happiness comes from a relationship with

Christ and putting Him first.  

I am so thankful for this trial and being used

of God to share with others how blessed we 

truly are.  I am so exited about the future and

the many blessings God is giving to our family.  

I also want to thank all the friends who have been

so diligent in praying for our family.  We have

felt God's hand on us and know your prayers

have been such a comfort to us.  We love you.  

Yes, I eat raw cookie dough!  I also eat just chocolate

cake for breakfast and sometimes for dinner as well.

I also sometimes share these pleasures with my sweet

granddaughter Maggie.  

I know some of you are thinking "Oh my, there are

raw eggs in it?"  I know, but honestly, the pleasure

is worth the risk.  I have been eating raw cookie

dough for my entire life and I am still alive.  

What is it about cookie dough?  I don't know exactly,

I just know it is yummy!  It gives you that living on 

the edge feel . . . taking a risk on life . . .  taking a

chance.  It may not seem like that big of risk compared

skydiving, playing russian roulette, or bungee jumping,

but it is about the biggest risk I am willing to take.  

Are you willing to take risks?  Are you afraid to make

a change in your life, worrying what could happen?  Or

are you trusting God in all things . . . knowing confidently

that all things always work for our good?  And the big

question is "What is good?"  And "Are all things good?"

Our lives are filled with good things and not so good

things.  Are you counting on God to work all things for

your good?  Who is to say what is good?  Is God's good

and perfect plan going against your "perfect plan"?

I have found that trusting God in all things is the only

way to have total peace with Him.  And peace with

Him is the only way to live.  True contentment can only

come in your life when you are in God's will.  God's will

may not always be your desire or your perfect place.

It may be filled with pain, disappointment, illness,

and trials.  God promises not to ever leave or forsake

us  . . . ever.  He is there in happy and sad times.

He rejoices with us and he also mourns with us.  

His desire is for us to grow in Him in all circumstances.

Are you using your current situation to bring glory

to God?  We can always rejoice in all things . . . knowing

that they will all bring good!  Isn't that a comfort to know,

to know that every step, every tear and every smile is 

not a surprise to God?  

As we approach the start of 2014 . . . a new year . . .a

new beginning . . . keep in mind that God is in control.

Let your New Year's Resolution be to praise God in all

things!  He can turn the darkest place in your life into

a place of rejoicing.  Will you praise Him today?  It's not a

risk  . . . it is a promise of blessings and good things . . . 

kind of like cookie dough.   Make a batch and be sure to

lick the bowl.  

Happy New Year,

Lisa

Christmas is one week from today.   

Are you ready?  There is always

so much to do this time of year . . baking,

buying gifts, hosting and attending parties,

caroling, sending cards, and so many other

activities that can take away our focus

on the real reason we are celebrating in

the first place.  Have you found time to

celebrate the birth of Christ with your 

family?  If you haven't, I urge you to

take time to spend time together as a

family and worship His birth.  

My family and I always attend the Christmas

eve candlelight service at my church and

then we all gather at my home and have

dinner and open presents.  This has always 

been a special time spent with the ones I

love the most.  I enjoy it more than ever now

 that I am a Nana.  I love my grandchildren more than

I could ever put into words. I love their warm hugs,

the smell of their hair, their giggles, and the

way they make me feel loved.  I can barely go one

day without seeing them.  Christmas is pure JOY 

with them in my life.  

I thought this Christmas would be difficult since 

my recent divorce.   I wondered how I would

celebrate with all the changes in my life.  There have

been moments of sadness, as I decorated the 

tree . . . as I got Christmas cards addressed to 

the both of us . . . and as I opted for minimal

decorations, instead of decking the house out

and hosting our usual open house.  

But, honestly, I can say that I have spent so

much time with God the past few months, praying

through the storm . . . that there is such a depth

of intimacy with Him that I could have only found

through suffering.  There is a reliance on Him that

can only be experienced when everything else

around me seemed to give way.   I have had

to cling to the Jesus . . . and have found it to

be the most wonderful journey in my entire 

spiritual walk.  I know that may be hard to

imagine . . . but I wouldn't trade the suffering

for what I am experiencing now!  I have grown

to depend on Him and His word and His promises!

I am not afraid of what tomorrow will bring . . . he

promises that all things will be for my good.  That

is His promise . . . and I cling to that.  I am so 

looking forward to His plans for me in the future.

There has been so many blessings we have 

experienced in our family.  We have a love

for each other that we had not felt before.  My

girls and son-in-laws are all so close.  There is

so much love when we are all together, we

can hardly contain it.  It has been amazing.  I 

would not trade this for anything in the world.  

Through the pain and suffering, we have all 

been blessed beyond measure.   

Blessings have also come through so many 

friends who have been there when I needed 

them most.  I didn't realize how many friends I 

actually had until I needed them . . . they were

there taking me to lunch, bringing me lunch,

sending cards, texting, calling to check on how I was

 doing, coming over just to cry with me, supporting 

 and encouraging me, and most of all lifting me

up in prayer.  I thank God for each and every

one of you . . . you will never know how encouraging

you are to me.  I love you all.  Thank you!

Please keep my family in your prayers.  We feel

your love and support every day.  May you and 

your family have a blessed Christmas this year!  

Christmas is my favorite time of the year.  It

means enjoying our family and friends, but 

most of all it means celebrating the birth of our

Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  It means preparing

our hearts and our home for all of the upcoming

celebrating. 

 I have been busy decking the halls of many

 homes and transforming them into winter 

wonderlands.  I wanted to share some of the

Christmas cheer with you.  Hope you enjoy.  

This tree has a snowman theme woven into

this slim tree.  The snowman head seems 

right at home peeking from beneath the branches.

Many other snowmen were used to 

continue our frosty theme.  

 A custom tree skirt was added this year in
a harlequin pattern complete with monogram.  

The mantle was adorned with two dancing reindeer 
and painted presents peeking from the garland.

 The angle on this shot is challenging, but this
is the bannister, complete with grapevine
reindeer to greet you when you enter the 
front door.  Excuse the cord, we hid this 
later.  ;-)

 This tree has a natural look and has a woodland
theme.  I used burlap ribbon, galvanized
buckets, woodland creatures, mercury glass,
acorns and snow covered sticks.  

Little bear feels right at home nestled in
the middle of the branches.   

Mr. Owl keeps watch on the bottom branches.
  He is watching and waiting for Santa.   

I kept the sideboard simple with simple pines. 
The sideboard and antique window mirror is
so pretty, simple is the best choice here.  

The kitchen table was adorned with moss
covered reindeer, complete with burlap bows.

 The silver accents look amazing on this
mirrored coffee table.  Simple and sophisticated.  

 Robin egg blue and mercury glass on this
tree accent the decor in this living room.  

 Love the mix of pearl, mercury glass
and icy blue.  

 Hydrangeas and pine were placed in pearl
cones that were placed in the tree to give
it three dimension.

A bowl full of ornaments is a simple way
to add sparkle.  

  The dining table is kept simple by using
existing lanterns and adding mini ornaments around
 candles.  A ribbon was tied to add a festive touch.   

And the best gift of Christmas is to enjoy
this new little bundle of joy.  My newest
grandson, Stryker Cannon Smalley.  He
is definitely ready for Christmas and is
patiently waiting on Santa.

Enjoy decorating your homes this year and
remember to enjoy and cherish every moment
with your family and friends.  May God bless
you.

Have you ever thought your life was perfect.  You have the dream house, 

wonderful children, a beautiful grandchild, two more on the way, friends,

and a wonderful life?  I thought I did.  I cherished my family more than 

anything else.  Time spent with my husband and my girls was the most

wonderful time I could have ever imagined.  

I was finally at a semi-retirement time in my life.  I worked as

I wanted, attended Community Bible Study, and has just started 

teaching a ladies class at my church.  Life was good.  I felt I could

take on pretty much anything life could send my way.  I was always

the strong one . . . the one who never cracked under pressure.  

Well, I thought wrong.  The rug was pulled out from under my feet

on September 24th of this year.  My husband gave me a letter, left

on my porch for my youngest daughter to find and bring in to me

to read.  It stated that he was filing for a divorce, that I would be

served on the the following Wednesday.  He never came home 

that evening.  He hasn't come home since.  

What I found out during the next week of investigating what 

went wrong, literally knocked me off my feet.  I have never felt

so low or so alone in my entire life.  There hasn't been one day

that I have not cried or felt totally abandoned.  This is one thing

I never imagined I would ever face in my lifetime.  After 32 years

of marriage, I had to wonder what had went wrong.  I still cannot

wrap my thoughts around what is happening in my life.  

My perfect life has ended.  My smiles have been replaced with

sorrow and tears.  I have not chosen this path, but it has been

chosen for me.  As sad as this is, I have learned to trust God in

all things.  After all, He is the only one who never disappoints.  

He promises to never leave or forsake us.  He is our Savior and 

our hope.  This is what I cling to as I face the upcoming divorce. 

I know that all things work together for good and I am so

thankful that God has comforted me and never left me.  I am so

thankful for the support of my wonderful church family and my 

friends who have been there every step of they way.  My girls have

been my rock, they are amazing women.  My son-in-laws have

made me so proud that they are married to my daughters.  Our 

family has bonded and held on to each other during this tragedy.  

Thank you all for your support and love.  Please pray for us 

as we face the days ahead.  

Finding the Perfect Church

Are you searching for the "perfect church"?  My husband and I

have been on the quest for the last seven years.  We left a church

we were a part of for many years.  Here we  served as  Sunday School

teacher, choir member, soloist, deacon, nursery worker, committee

member,  and many other roles during our time there.  We had many

friends and many ministries there.  We were always anxious to 

see what God had for us while we were a part of this wonderful

fellowship.  

You many wonder why we left?  We got caught up in a typical

church scandal.  You know the kind . . . she said/he said

things were going on that were clouding our ability to worship

and serve.  We didn't agree with some of the things that were

going on. . . . we felt leaving was our only option.  

Many of us find ourselves in search of the "perfect church",

diligently seeking one where every member is in perfect

harmony . . . where everything runs as it should.  A church

where everyone is so holy the halos are almost visible, where

every doctrine that is taught is identical with our beliefs, and

every aspect of the worship service is just as we imagine it

should be.  So, after seven years of searching . . . we have

come to the conclusion that there is no perfect church and that

we are far from perfect church members. 

  I think we  have visited every single church with similar beliefs within

a 30 mile radius of our home.  We went so far as to hypothetically

creating the perfect church.  We took our favorite pastor, worship

leader, youth minister and congregation and rolled it all up in a

perfect church.  That seems silly to think about . . . we finally

realized that this place we were searching for did not exist.

It surely didn't exist on earth because perfection is only found

in heaven.  

We agree now that leaving was the wrong thing for us to do 

seven years ago and that we walked away from a ministry

God had so carefully placed us in.  What we have learned

from the years of searching is how to be better 

church members. . . . we have visited so much that 

we know how it feels to be the new face, how

good it feels to be greeted at the door, and for someone

to remember our name.  We can now serve with this

knowledge that we have learned and turn it all into good

as we begin to serve the Lord again in this fellowship 

of believers.  

So, if you are looking for the perfect church . . . STOP.

It is not there.  Pray that God would place you in a 

church where you can serve him. . . . and hang in there

even when things seem impossible.  Be part of the 

solution and don't walk away . . . because peace

has come for us when we swallowed our pride and 

went back to the ministry God has placed us in.  

 Welcome to my garden.  I realize it has been a while since I have 

blogged . . . but summer has kept me busy with many projects

and some much needed down time.  My favorite place to be

at home is outside in the garden.  We have lived in our home

for five years now and we have worked with Mike Omar 

from Morgreen Nursery and Landscape every step of the way.

He is amazing at seeing the total picture and creating layers

of vivid color.  

 I love to use basil and rosemary in the kitchen, so this

is my "herb garden" . . .

 I love red geraniums in clay pots . . .

 These are my Four Seasons statues . . . a mothers

day gift several years ago.  They are right at home by

the water feature.  The pool was installed by West Pools.

Jay West was amazing and did an outstanding job.  We

have enjoyed the pool more than I imagined.  

 Our latest addition is this fire pit.  When complete, it will

have ice blue glass fire . . . saw it on Pinterest.  So fun,

we will enjoy this later in the Fall.  

 The view looking at the back of the house. . .

 I love Kimberly Queen ferns.  These planters

look wonderful with the draping leaves of the fern. 

 Our newest addition, a sidewalk to take us 

back up to the patio. . .

 I definitely need to add some more plants . . .

there is always next year. . . 

 The back porch . .  my favorite place. . .

 We enjoy most meals out here from Spring until Fall . . .

 My new Homegoods find . .  a server.  

 The view from the back door . . . this is what greets me

every morning. . . 

 I just love the layers of color . . .

 "Mr. Clean" is busy cleaning the pool. . .

 This is the friends entry.  Mike gave this area an English

Garden feel . . .

 This is the entrance from the driveway to the English Garden.

Thanks, Jana Cleves, for these wonderful ivy planters. 

They are right at home here . . .

 Benches flank either side of brick walk . . .

 I love sweet potato vine mixed with red geraniums . . .

 Friends entry stoop . . .

 Formal front entry.  I found the monogram letters

from Southern Proper Monograms online.  They

compliment the formal entry.  

 Front walk that winds around to english garden . . .

 Brick walls that flank driveway and front walk from street . . .

 This planter is a three tiered . . . I think . . .it has 

taken over the bed this year . . . 

 Mike created a barrier from future neighbors with a 

mix of shrubs and redwood trees . . .

 I must provide a home for my feathered friends . . .

 View towards back yard . . . Mr. Clean is still working. . .

This is my husband, Vince.  He is my master

gardener who keeps all of this looking beautiful.

He does a wonderful job . . . don't you think?